


the way that your heart breaks

by fallingmistinthedark



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrinette, An Idea I Had While Getting Ready for Soccer Practice, Anxiety, Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Grief, Identity Reveal, Ladrien!!!!, Mari watches Adrien sleep sometimes when she can't, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Plagg is a Little Shit, adrien's mom - Freeform, based on Again - Flyleaf, but I can't draw, this would work better as a comic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-17
Updated: 2016-11-17
Packaged: 2018-08-23 12:46:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8328532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallingmistinthedark/pseuds/fallingmistinthedark
Summary: It's been a year since Adrien became Chat Noir, a year since he met his Lady, and a year since the attacks started. They'd be triggered by the smallest things. A glittering red item elicited fears that Ladybug might be hurt, but the worst were when he got it from everyday things, things that reminded him of his mother. Perfume, flowers, books she'd read him, and her jewelry. (The AU in which Adrien gets panic attacks... I don't personally have these, so if this is offending I can take it off...)(I swear on my life I can't write angst so this is just a dash of angst and a fuckton of fluff)





	

"My Lady?" Adrien asks, grasping for her in the darkness of whatever this was. He knew he had to be dreaming, but it felt real, even if everything was abstract. Every time he made a grab for her, she'd dance just outside of his grasp, until he came to a door. It was plain, but it radiated warmth and everything that reminded him of his Lady and his mother. Biting his lip, he opened the door, blinded by the light spilling through it, illuminating the dark space around him until it was gone. 

Smiling, he stepped in, closing the door behind him. He turned back, ready to greet the two people he loved dearly, but his face fell, breaking apart in misery, confusion, shock, and anguish at the sight before him. Two people lay in delicately made glass coffins, one stained with red. The inhabitant, he discovered, was dressed in red. It was his Lady with a sword through her chest as she coughed blood and looked into his eyes, breathing her last. Her eyes slid shut, barely there tears showing just how much pain she had been in. He tore his eyes away, only to watch his mother sigh peacefully, as she too, closed her beautiful eyes. He never did get to see her eyes in this dream, but it never mattered. The ending was always the same. 

Dropping to his knees, he clutched his head in his arms, trying so, so hard to keep everything inside. In this dream nobody ever came for him, there was no Nino, no Alya, no Natahlie. He was alone then, and that's what always suffocated him, ending the dream as woke up screaming, or crying, or both. It was nice to have soundproof walls sometimes. At least his father couldn't hear the, in his bedroom when he was here. 

He opened his eyes, and he was already upright, breathing heavily as tears streamed down his face. He wandered why he'd been woken up early. Usually, he got a sword throw his own chest from someone behind him. A literal stab in the back, which had always made him wander... His thoughts ended as he caught sight of red in the moonlight, spotted with black, and it complimented her blue-black hair. His Lady stood on his open window sill, staring at him with something akin to worry, but it was deeper than that. 

"Ladybug!" Adrien gasped, and she smiled softly, but it did nothing when her usually vibrant blue eyes were dulled with sadness and exhaustion. 

"Hi, Adrien. I was swinging past on my yo-yo when I spotted you. It looked like you were having a rough time, so I pushed a window open to calm you down. I guess the sound woke you. I'm sorry." She explains, adding a quick apology on the end even though he doesn't mind one bit. Having her here is reassuring, but it'd be better if he could touch her. His Lady takes another cautious step forward when he nods, still trying to calm down. "How bad was it?" She asks after another minute, giving him something to tell her. He honestly had no idea where to start. 

"Bad. It was about my mom." _Not entirely true but not entirely lying_ , Adrien thinks as he finishes rasping out his answer. He'll have to get up for glass of water after she leaves. 

"I remember it being in the news. I am so sorry, Adrien." She responds, sitting down at the edge of his huge bed with that same cautious air to her. It's wrong on her, an air he usually only sees around Marinette. At least, he only sees it when she talks to him. He's always wondered why she never talked like she did with the others around him. He guessed that she didn't like him, and he couldn't blame her for that after the gum incident. 

"It's fine. You being here helps a lot, actually." Just as he finishes talking and Ladybug reaches for him, a flashback of the dream crosses his thoughts and he jerks, physically. Ladybug retracts her hand, staring at him with worry. 

"Does it? That makes me glad." Ladybug blushes, and he almost thinks he imagined it, but then her words start catching up to his foggy mind and he brightens, just in time for her to add, "Because that's my job, of course." He has half a mind to think she added that on because she was embarrassed. 

"Thank you." Adrien adds, but soon the dream is coming back to him full-force and his breaths come in short spurts. He can faintly hear the sound of shifting on his mattress, and he registers the sound of a soft voice, laced with empathy and warmth. 

"Adrien... Adrien. Adrien!" The first things he hears after coming back from that horrendous flashback is her voice, calling his name ever so softly, ever so carefully. Her eyes are right there, and he feels arms around him. _She's holding me. Ladybug is actually holding me._

"Yeah?" She smiles, a relieved ghost on her lips. 

"It worked. Just like when my Dad would help me through mine." Her statement surprises him. _She used to have panic attacks? But she's so collected..._

"You had panic attacks?" She shrugs at his question, closing her eyes for a moment.

"Sure. It always gets better. One thing I've learned over the years." She answers, and seemingly realizing what she was doing, she backs off, releasing him and edging off the bed. "You must think I'm weird, but I know you. We go to the same school."

"W-we do?" Adrien asks at the statement, and she smiles softly, a look of sadness? in her eyes. 

"Mmhmm. I don't exactly have a different hairstyle. I'm surprised Alya hasn't figured it out." She muses, bringing her knees up and placing her chin on them. That is the moment Adrien spots a blur of black on the far side of the room, registering it as Plagg. _Can nothing go right for him?_

Adrien's mind pushes the Plagg incident to the back of his mind as it start showing thinking of all the girls in his class with two ponytails. Aurore comes to mind, but Adrien shakes his head at the thought, since the hair color is definitely wrong and she's taller than Ladybug. 

"Plus, the girl under the mask is not nearly as strong and admirable as you're probably thinking." She continues, looking towards him but not quite meeting his eyes. 

"I'm sure you're every bit as strong and admirable under the mask, albeit it might be a quieter strength." Adrien says afterward he's sure she's done. She looks up in surprise, a light blush dusting her cheeks. 

"Thank you." She tells him, her smile much more genuine, "I'd never thought about it that way before."

"So.... what's your favorite color?" Adrien asked, an attempt to break the awkward silence that had settled over them like a familiar blanket.

"Pink." She answered instantly, finally with enough courage to meet his eyes. 

"Do you... " Ladybug's question stops mid sentence when her head turns to see the floating black PLAGG _why now of all times?_ floating there with that little smirk he gets with terrible ideas. 

"Ladybug! A delight to have you with us." Ladybug, to her credit remains very still, the only sign of her distress is her mouth, which is pressed in a thin line. 

"Kwami?" Comes out in strange starngled noise from Ladybug, who finally moves, turning more to look at Plagg, completely ignoring him as she does. 

"Yes, Ladybug. I am the kwami of the one called 'Chat Noir'." 

"Why are you in Adrien Agreste's house?" The question becomes higher in pitch as it goes on, and Plagg looks like he's actually trying hard not to laugh. 

"He feeds me to use my powers?" Plagg asks, almost like it's the most obvious thing in the world. Her head snaps around so fast he's surprised it didn't give her whiplash. 

"Is that so?" She asks in the same way, an almost eerily calm and cheery smile on her face. Plagg nods, an action which she sees, and she releases whatever breath Adrien didn't think she'd been holding. "May I use your bathroom to consult with Tikki?" 

Adrien nods numbly, and she's gone into the bathroom, a red flash coming from the other room. He can hear hushed girl voices, but can't really distinguish them, until lo and behold, a startlingly familiar girl walks out, a look of absolute annoyance and irritation on her face. 

"Marinette?" Adrien says, letting out a breath he didn't even know he'd been holding. _I'm not very observant, am I?_ he thought. 

"Chaton." She replies, and he just about dies. Whatever this is, he's too sleep deprived to figure out, rolls over on his side and says, "Goodnight. I'm going to need sleep before I can fully comprehend this."

He hears Plagg grumble, and he also hears Marinette laugh, a light, free sound. He also hears her murmur something, and a red light fills the room for a moment before she stalks into his vision, pushes the window open, and exits, closing the door softly behind her. 

_Yep_ he thinks, _I am going to need a LOT of sleep_.


End file.
